I Wanted to be Different, Just Like All the Other Different People

Mrs. S made a very insightful comment to me at the recent blogger meetup in Modiin. She said "You make so many great comments, why don't you just turn them into posts?" I am a pretty prolific commenter, I'm not sure why I don't turn them more into posts. That strategy would populate this blog a bit more.

I'm really glad I made it to the meeting, despite being appallingly late once again. It was great to see everyone and great to hear some blogging tips from the pro, Mom in Israel.

******************

So, because I'm a friend or fan of a Morasha alumni group on Facebook, I got a notice about an alumni event they're planning soon, in the States. Obviously not relevant to me, but I started snooping around their site and discovered they have photo archives going back to the sixties. Since I went there from 85 to about 91 ( I skipped a year but went on their Sulam Israel trip, Gd knows why), I started trying to look up my old camp photos and look what I found:



What a hoot. Can you guess which one is me? Yes, the only one wearing a blue shirt. I wanted to be different, just like all the other different people... Why the heck couldn't I find a red shirt? And why am I wearing a skirt? I wasn't particularly frum back then, as far as I can remember. I definitely wore pants and shorts in general.

I love the commentary in this photo about Modern Orthodoxy. The majority of the girls are wearing pants, shorts and short sleeves.  I was 13 then, what a horrifically awkward age. Just leaving childhood, not quite a grownup. I wasn't a big fan of camp, but this age was particularly difficult. I was never good at dealing with cliques (to this day I can't seem to get the hang of it). Because of this I'm very sensitive to how my daughters deal with their friends and if I hear of any kind of insensitivity, on their part or their friends, I try to help them work through it. I also encourage them to be as inclusive as possible. Since I've gotten a lot of positive feedback from their friends' parents this seems to be working. 

(As an aside, I notice a lot of parents have a hands-off approach when it comes to their kids and friends. I really believe that kids need to learn how to be good friends and they need guidance from parents on how to be sensitive and inclusive. I think that children have some natural empathy and sensitivity but these feelings do need to be nurtured and supported). 

I look at photos like this and I feel like I've lived so many mini-lifetimes already- distinct time periods that I'll never be able to go back to but are still so sharp in my memory. I'm starting to have that feeling even in my own marriage- I'll never be able to go back to the first year of our marriage, my oldest will never be a baby anymore. Hard to believe.

5 comments:

Leora said...

I feel old. I went to Moshava in the 1970's.

"my oldest will never be a baby anymore" - when my eldest was a babe, I was infatuated with him. Lucky for him, I got over that (he's 15). But that certainly was a distinct period in my life.

I see some frum girls wearing pants outside of school in New Jersey.

Mrs. S. said...

It was great to meet you, and thanks for the shout-out!

I wanted to be different, just like all the other different people.
This is why it's impossible to go shopping with one's teenaged daughter(s). They want clothes which are different and unique but also exactly the same as everyone else... :-)

Jameel @ The Muqata said...

There's a good reason you're "Commenter" Abbi!

:-)

Lakewood Falling Down said...

"I look at photos like this and I feel like I've lived so many mini-lifetimes already- distinct time periods that I'll never be able to go back to but are still so sharp in my memory"

That is one of the best phrased lines I have ever had the pleasure to read. I made me feel old and young and hopeful at the same time. I was looking at old pictures of me and Mrs. LFD (believe it or not, we were teenage "sweethearts"), and it seems like a lifetime ago. Mini-lifetime indeeed. May we all have so many pleasent memories!

Commenter Abbi said...

LFD, that's really the nicest comment I've ever had the pleasure to read! Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment!

Amen to your bracha, may we all have many pleasant memories. :)

Post a Comment